So today makes the first weekend that the girls will be staying with their dad. I am not sure what I am going to do with myself. My girls have been pretty much on top of me since this whole thing happened. My oldest and her dad are having a lot of problems right now and not getting along to well but I still think it is best for her to go even if she spends most of the time at her cousins house this way she gets into the routine. I had a long talk with my husband last night and think that he understands that we will not be getting back together. It is really hard to see him so sad and depressed but this is just what needs to happen.
I came to realize last night that I have people that really do care about me. I know one of them has been praying for me and my girls and probably even my husband. I thank you June because I can feel it. I know that I have some people I can vent to and will just let me explode and get it all off my chest and let me cry and give me hugs when I need it. I know that it won't always be this hard but right now it is. My children honestly seem to be doing better than him and I are.
But on to this weekend! I will be free for the first time in a long time and I have nothing to do. It will be nice just to relax and read a bit maybe rent a movie or two. I am going to church on Saturday. Sunday before I pick up the girls I am going to get the meals for the week prepared to be cooked so all that I have to do when I get home during the week is cook it and the preparation is done. So doesn't that sound like a blast, lol. Maybe sooner than later I will be going out and letting lose. Who knows but I am really actually looking forward to doing a lot of nothing this weekend. I think I may go out to a movie tonight and see Gangster Squad but other than that and church and my first bountiful basket experience first thing Saturday morning I don't have much planned. Well one reason being that I am super broke. This living on my own crap pretty much sucks because I have no extra money but I guess in time I will learn how to stretch my dollar. Maybe I will go to the gym and get my sweat on. This is time for me to really focus on me and get me happy and focused.
Life is an adventure and sometimes it seems that the mountain you are climbing is never ending but I bet that once I reach the top of this mountain that the view is going to be amazingly breathtaking. I feel that honestly I have earned it. So I wish the same for my husband and hopefully he will realize that this is all for the best. We can be amazing co-parents together and the greatest of friends we just need to give it the time that is needed.
Well that is all for now. One of my friends had me look up a country song called every storm runs out of rain and if I knew how I would put the link up here on this post but so far I am not that savvy with this site. I will get better and figure more things out but if you get a chance listen to that song it is amazing.
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